This is my list of thoughts that come to mind as I reminisce about my early years with Charles Nicholas Venezia, my older brother:

Charlie has always been too damn smart! He received scholarships to both Xaverian (only the best private boy’s high school in Brooklyn) AND New York University.

Charlie has always been extremely ethical. When he was a child, our mother would send him to his room as punishment, and tell him to lie on his bed and wait for her to come upstairs to spank him. He would be waiting there an hour later, expecting to get what he deserved. When she would say the same thing to me, I would go to my room and play with my dolls.

We spent our childhood trying to torture each other. If we were watching television and things were too quiet, I would slap my arm and run into the kitchen screaming that my brother hit me! My parents would discipline him, but eventually I think they caught on because I really don’t remember that he was ever punished!

I know that sounds terrible, but let me tell you how he tortured me. He would wait until I was all the way at the end of the block, playing with my friends. Then, he would call me in a high C that lasted easily five minutes: Baaaaabra. As I approached him, he would look at me very seriously, tighten four fingers on his right hand, and pretend to slit his throat from left to right. This was his signal that I was going to die when I arrived home. I believed it every time.

I truly believed that one of the rockets that he shot from our postage stamp backyard in Brooklyn would make it to the moon. I wonder to this day if he ever actually made one of his pet mice an astronaut.

Summer vacations were the best. Driving in the car with my father who smoked constantly and never wanted to stop for food was tons of fun. There was no air conditioning, so you had to scream to be heard above the wind coming in from the open windows. My brother sat in the front and was the navigator. I was permitted to keep a record of our expenses. My brother was also in charge of taking movies at my father’s command. We have on film every bridge up and down the east coast, from Maine to Florida.

Every holiday our cousins would come to our house because our grandmother (Nonni) lived downstairs. After dinner, the cousins would all have to take a picture with Nonni on the back porch. Charlie and our cousin Fred could never be serious, and they would make all of the girl cousins laugh. Nonni would say that we were ruining what could be our last picture with her. The possibility that this was our last holiday with Nonni was noted by our grandmother for at least 16 years of my childhood, on every single holiday!

Charlie and Nonni had a very special bond. He was definitely her favorite. 

My favorite photo is of Charlie and me hanging stockings on the fake fireplace that our grandmother had. Although I wasn’t even two years old, the picture reminds me of how I have always looked up to my brother and tried to emulate him. As a child and perhaps even as an adult, my goal has been to not embarrass him, but rather to make him proud to have me as his sister.

I think the first time that Charlie appreciated having me as his sister, was the day that blood type and organ donors were discussed in his sixth grade science class. He rationalized that my existence may be tolerable, in case he ever needed me as a blood or organ donor.

Another good thing that came from Charlie’s science class was that he alone was successful in convincing my parents to stop smoking.

I finally became friends with Charlie in high school. We dated each other’s friends, went to Xaverian basketball games together, and had parties in our basement. He even took me to see the Johnny Carson Show.

In the last semester of my junior year in high school, I was struggling with trigonometry. This was particularly traumatic to me, as I had already decided to major in math in college. Charlie tutored me and explained the rationale of the Trig Regents. He said that no matter how the problems were disguised, there would be one of this type, one of this second type, etc. I got 95 on that Regents exam totally because of his logic. To this day he can rationalize how to solve any calculus or probability problem I throw at him. He solves more Car Talk puzzles than anyone I know.

One of Charlie’s best accomplishments was marrying Myra 33 years ago. She actually appreciates his love of science fiction and Gilbert and Sullivan. She lived in Korea with him when he was in the Army, and they have had some marvelous trips and adventures together. They have stuck it out, through the many highs and lows that life offers.

Charlie’s other best accomplishment is his beautiful daughter, Diana. He loves her dearly, and is very proud of her journalistic and many other talents. He has transferred all of the videos of Diana’s childhood into a DVD collection in two leather bound volumes.

I love, admire and respect my brother, and I appreciate his sense of humor. He is unsurpassed as a role model in our family.